the.B.Law

I Just Want to be Cool Again

Remember what cool meant when you were young? Like elementary school age. Things were cool because you thought they were cool, and that was cool enough. Young, honest wholesome kids, learning about the world before being influenced by the media and other older kids.

How do we get back to that? How do we brush off the fear of what others think and just like what we like because WE like it? It seems simple enough.

I have always been an adaptor, changing to be more like the people I surround myself with. I don’t think that is a completely bad trait, but I wish I was less like that. My idea of being cool has always been skewed by my friends or outside people. I think this partially stems from the feeling of always wanting to fit in. I changed schools quite a bit when I was young and being the new kid isn’t always easy. Instead of being fully myself, I just wanted to quickly find a group of friends and fit in.

This even followed me into adulthood. It wasn’t too long ago I was hanging out with a new group of friends pretty often, and the things I thought were cool and important to me, like writing this blog, fashion, Instagram, and writing in general, I know they did not think was cool. So I tried to hide it, and in doing so, pretty much stopped writing this blog. To be honest, it has been hard to get back in the groove of it, but I really want to.

I want to be cool again by being myself, not by the definition of those around me, social media or anything else. So often I see people being their own genuine self and I feel envy (in a good way). I think they are cool for being themselves, so why can’t I do that for myself?

This is something I have been thinking a lot about this new year, the year I want to be about change. I have found trying to navigate this issue of being cool has given me more compassion (for lack of a better word) for others. It makes me think twice in a situation where I would judge someone, or when you’re with people who are making fun of someone else.

So here I stand. Hi, I am Brittany and I like to blog, post photos of cute outfits, obsessed with Harry Potter and Marvel movies, prefer to stay in and read or watch a movie instead of party, not really a fan of drinking anymore, and yes I like to take and post photos of my cute coffees. These things are cool to me.

So let’s give everyone some grace and appreciate the uniqueness in this world, instead of judging people for not being like ourselves. Let’s be cool again.

lifestyle, the.B.Law

Changing My Entire Outlook On Life

It’s me. Hi. I’m the problem, it’s me.

I don’t care how often that lyric is getting used by basic girls around the world, I still love it. I am the problem I am never on here and hopefully I will be the pushing change to come back.

Anywho, hello! Happy 2023! Not going to lie, not a fan of the number but whatever, can’t change the name of the year because I am weird. We are 20 days in and I am fighting the urge to feel behind because my sister and I decided we are doing this year different. We are going to give ourselves grace and space. Working on stopping the toxic mindsets of needing to change everything about us all at once. Instead our plan is to change everything about us, but slowly and one piece at a time. We call it… “Changing Our Entire Outlook On Life”, and I am here for it.

Last year was a big year. An exciting year! But an equally stressful year. My fiancé and I moved in together in February, and in November got married. So great! Like dream status. But that all came with a lot of stress and a lot of pressure put on myself by myself. I will do another post on the wedding and wedding stress later, but all of last year was basically consumed with that.

This year I am focusing on myself, my husband, and what makes me happy, no matter how small! My sister and I started off by making a list of little things that make us feel happy or put together. Simple things like having our nails painted (which I haven’t at all these last 20 days), making cute lattes at home, and dressing in our color aesthetic. It is hard to explain, but we basically want to make our aesthetic our lifestyle. I know that makes no sense to most, but if you get it, good for you.

These last 20 days I have been working on internally fighting the pressure to be at the gym every day, change my entire diet, and be hitting every single goal I wish I could be. Instead I have been giving myself time. Time to reflect on what I really want to accomplish, the person I want to be, and the wife I want to be. I really haven’t gotten that many tangible things done in this first month, but I think getting my mind right is a good first place to start.

So here is to the new year. I say it every year, but this time I truly have feelings this will be THE YEAR. The year that is mine, and not everyone else’s because I keep giving it to them. Sorry everyone, but it is my turn.

PS – my hair is brown now. What can I say, new year new me.

Style, the.B.Law

Neutrals

Lately I have been feeling my style changing into something I have wanted for a long time. Is that weird to say? I feel as if I have been stalking and studying this style for some time, but have not been able to achieve yet. The style of N E U T R A L S.

I have often, and still currently, have long conversations with my sister on how to achieve the neutral style classification. Our problem always being drawn to colors, and bright colors at that. Although I still love a bright outfit, over that past few months I have been collecting more neutral items, tops specifically, and leaving bright pieces as more of special statement pieces. Finally last month, I really felt it come together. For a week straight I just kept picking out neutral outfits and feeling really good about it. I think one of the best things about it is that the pieces for the most part all go together, meaning the combination options are endless.

I am still trying to put my own flare into the neutral game. I don’t want to just wear solids so I have been mixing in different patterns, textures, and even graphic tees. I am excited for cooler weather so I can really step into this new style more. I want to really get creative with it.

My current favorite inspiration for neutrals is Christina from @newdarlings, her vibe in everything is seriously so amazing.

Links below to some of my current faves (some are on sale too!)

Look 4 is from MATE the Label (would really love to be an ambassador for them, I am working on it!)

lifestyle, the.B.Law

5 Recent Things – 6/19/22

I have been trying to make super small changes lately, and I am pleased. Here are 5 things I have done over the last couple weeks and small as they may be, have made a difference:

Picked out my outfit every night for the next day
Packed my protein shakes and greens and all the healthy things I am trying to drink the night before
Worked out (almost) every day, no matter how small the workout (I think I have missed one day)
Read – actually finished my book
Talked writing with my sister and it is motivating me

I want to keep going with these changes and adding more. Not huge, huge can feel daunting and then I feel I tend to put them off. Little changes will add up to big ones. Something I want to add this week is write. Even if it is a little something. A small blog like this, a poem, a few sentences. Just something to get me started.

Here is to small changes and growing big goals. xoxo

Happy Father’s Day to tall the dads out there!

beauty, life, lifestyle, the.B.Law

Clean Teeth, Warm Heart

Hello there!

Want to know a fun fact? I recently celebrated my one year anniversary of getting my braces off 😆. Yes it has been a year and yes I am still a psycho about my teeth (or at least I try to be). I brush, I floss, I whiten… and now I have a new product I love. Did you know, that there are probiotics for your teeth?! I was not aware of this, until my friends at Smile Brilliant reached out to me.

I have had the privilege of working with Smile Brilliant multiple times, and now we are doing our fourth project together! They are a brand and a company I have grown to trust and love, as I literally use their products every day. Their newest addition though, is Dental Probiotics. You chew one a day (at night after brushing your teeth) and you are all set! So quick and easy to add into your routine, and they taste good too (like, for real).

I know we hear about “regular” probiotics all the time, so what are dental probiotics good for? Um a bunch of things. Allow me to enlighten you. They allow healthy bacteria in your mouth AND in your sinuses! Yeah remember? These things are connected. They also help fight plaque build-up and decay, as well as supports good breath. Aside from these great results, the dental probiotics also help build your immunity. YES! These little chewables can help your cold/flu immune support. That is one thing I thought was really great about them. The more to help me not get sick, the better. Also, anything that helps my sinuses, count me in on that too.

One more cool thing, they also have Oral Probiotics for kids! Which is great considering I feel like I only get sick after I have been around my nieces and nephews…

I recommend giving them a try. The bottle is a 30 day supply, so perfect to try out for a month.

But also while I am at it, let me remind you of their other great products I love. LIKE THEIR TEETH WHITENING. This is definitely something I am trying to keep up on since I have my wedding coming up. I love the custom trays, and the results are great and lasting. Which is especially good since I love my coffee. Read up on my latest review of their custom whitening trays here, they are bomb!

But the product I use every day is Smile Brilliant’s CariPro Electric Tooth brush. I even got my fiancé and one of our roommates to start using one too. I just love how it has multiple settings, like SENSITIVE, for my always sensitive teeth. My review of the best tooth brush here.

If you do check Smile Brilliant out, which you should, be sure to use my code THEBLAW20 for 20% off!

Love yous! – B

life, lifestyle

Pull Me Out of This Funk

Has anyone else felt a lack of motivation or inspiration lately? I have been feeling it bad. Always busy and always tired, so when I finally have a moment of nothing, I want to do nothing. It has been quite frustrating. There are so many things I need/want to do. LIKE WORK OUT FOR ONE. Write blogs, read, put cute outfits together for darn sake to make me feel better about life, or you know… WEDDING PLAN! I have had motivation for nothing. I am ready for change. I need to pull myself out of this funk. It is like my brain is ready to do things but my body won’t follow. BUT NOW IT IS TIME. SO until I can fully pull myself out of this slump, here are some super small things that make me happy and are helping to pull me through:

Homemade honey lavender lattes in my cute mugs (no offense to the not cute mugs)
Sitting on my back porch
Listening to the geese in the lake (as annoying as they are while I am trying to sleep)
Re-watching every episode of Selling Sunset
My fiancé cooking me dinner
Watching The Ranch with my fiancé while we eat dinner
The sun going down late
Watching the little kids play on the beach
Trips to Hobby Lobby
The fact that I realized I have kept a plant alive since we moved in

All tips for motivation or inspiration welcome.

Thanks – B

the.B.Law

Eternal Ray of Effing Sunshine

Let’s have a therapy session, shall we? I want to talk about optimism and positivity. Two great things, wouldn’t you agree? I am kind of known as the eternal optimist in my neck of the woods. I am always pushing for my friends and my family to see the brighter side of things, to search for the positives in every situation rather than dwell on the bad or what could go wrong. I push it a lot with my older sister whom I live with. She has a letter board in the living room and I made it say “Negative Nancy don’t live here no more”. Not long before that, the board used to say “What is the glass? Half full!”. I make she and my now nine-year-old niece chant both of these phrases often.

Negative Nancy don’t live here no more!

I tend to be this way at work too. I figure in most cases, work and personal life, what is being negative going to do to help better any situation? It isn’t going to do anything but give you a bad attitude. Usually, with some patience and a positive attitude, you can get through most bad situations. But recently, I have felt myself growing tired of my role as the eternal ray of sunshine. It has grown from me wanting to be positive, to it feeling like it is my RESPONSIBILITY to be positive, like it is my duty. It is like I have created this character and I am not allowed to break from it. Which makes it sound like a bad thing. I am not trying to brag like “oh I am so positive all the time” and give myself an undercover compliment. You know when you are in a job interview, and they ask what your weakness is, and you say something like “I am a perfectionist,” or “I work too much and don’t like to leave things unfinished” as a way of complimenting yourself? This is not what this is. In this case, I am finding out that for me, being so positive all the time, is resulting negatively on myself. I am pouring so much out into everyone else with this character that I must be, that I am EXHAUSTED. The pressure I have bestowed upon myself is just ridiculous. As if I have any power at all, that if I am not positive on any given situation, that the world might crumble for that individual. As if I am the only thing keeping their head above the water. It is an incredible weight.

I have felt myself growing tired of my role as the eternal ray of sunshine.

Since I am the one who is always so positive and glass half full for everyone else, then I feel like I am not ALLOWED to feel negative our doubtful for myself. And since I am not ALLOWED to be this way publicly, it leaves me to have to feel negative, and down, and any other kind of bad emotion by myself and deal with it alone. Not having anyone be there and be positive for you because they don’t know that you need it, can feel really lonely. It doubles up on the exhaustion. Again you are pouring everything into everyone else, and left to try and recharge on your own. This has no bad reflection on the people around me, the fault is entirely on me. I have gotten so good at keeping a positive front, that I do not let my feelings show (or at least I think I do a good job at it) that something is wrong. I am very much in the mind set that I AM FINE, and can deal, and do not need help.

It is such a mix of great quality traits, turning on you to create a vicious cycle. One of your own making, fueled by everyone else expecting you to be this way because you have made them believe that this is you all the time, when in reality, you are drowning. I am drowning in my support for others emotions and I am not quite sure what to do about it. And let me tell you, emotional exhaustion hits different at the end of the day than physical exhaustion. It makes you incapable of doing what you need to do at the end of the day to feel successful or happy, which in turns makes you more unhappy.

And let me tell you, emotional exhaustion hits different at the end of the day than physical exhaustion.

Now this isn’t a feeling all the time. There are perfectly good days where I am positive, everyone else is positive, and things just go great. But some days can start to spiral and crumble because of a single moment. A whole day down the tubes, and most times it feels like there is no way to stop it. It feels like you are pushing everyone up above you until you’re at the bottom alone, with a body full of anxiety.

I am somehow able to verbalize this to myself and write it down here, and it seems simple to stop or change, but the immense pressure and rules we place on ourselves are a lot stronger than we realize. A simple task, ask for help. Complicated rebuttal, I CAN’T. I SO cannot be an inconvenience to anyone that I will choose to do everything I can on my own.

I’m not sure where I am going with this, I just felt the need to talk about it somewhere after multiple and increasing mental breakdowns that I try to not let show and will just deal with internally. If you understand me, let me know. If you have suggestions, let me know. I need to find a balance of being there for myself, just as much as I am there for others. Your encouragement is welcomed.

Thanks fiends for listening.

Love, Anxious Britt

the.B.Law

Check Out These Pearly Whites!

Hello there and happy Monday!

If you have been following along, then you know about my braces journey. How could you not know, it was all I could complain about 😆. Well, I have had them off for five months now AND I LOVE IT! Except, now I obsess about wearing my retainer. I swear one time I didn’t wear it for four hours, and a tooth moved. I literally wear it all the time because I don’t want to waste all the money I spent. Not to toot my own horn, but I have gotten pretty good at speaking with a retainer in. Except for when I am dehydrated and talking too fast, which let’s be real, that is all the time. But on a good day, or more in a good moment, I speak pretty clear with a minimal lisp.

Anyways, this post is not about my old news braces, it is about oral care and whitening. I had the opportunity to work with Smile Brilliant about three years ago trying out their custom whitening trays (read my first post here), then again two years ago to try their cariPro Electric Toothbrush (read that post here). They quickly became a company that I know and trust (and not just because their products are great, but their people are great too!)

The first time I tried their custom at-home teeth whitening system was before I had braces. Once I got my braces on I was sad that I had to throw my trays away. With this program, you get to make custom trays with molds they send you at home. Super easy to do. But since these trays are specifically designed for YOUR teeth, I couldn’t use mine anymore. So when Smile Brilliant reached out recently asking how I was doing and if we wanted to work together again, they offered me the opportunity to create new trays for my newly straightened teeth. You bet I was so excited to use these again because I KNOW it works, and I really wanted to whiten my new smile.

Same program as last time, I received the starter pack in the mail: the mold materials, instructions, and pre-paid package to send them back. I created my molds and even though this was the second time I have done this, I still messed up and had to use the extra materials they give you for a re-do, THANK YOU FOR SUPPORTING MY PERFECTIONISM. After I sent them in, I waited for their lab to create my teeth, I mean trays.

When they finally arrived, I was so anxious to get started. You have to remember that you brush first with just water, then put a thin layer of the whitening solution in each tray toward the front portion of the tray, pop them in your mouth and set a timer. You can have them in from 45 minutes to three hours! I have only ever been able to go an hour and 15 minutes because I have sensitive teeth, but I still see results with the shorter amounts of time. Once you are done with the whitening, you rinse out the trays, and put the desensitizing gel in the same way, and pop that on your teeth for 15-20 minutes. This helps with any sensitivity after whitening.

This time around, my teeth have been more sensitive, my assumption is because I had braces scraped off my teeth. I was educated that teeth get dehydrated, and was advised when I take a break from whitening, to use the trays with just the desensitizing gel a couple nights, then go back to whitening. This seemed to help. I had to take two to three days off at a time this time, so getting to the whiteness I wanted took a little longer, but I could see results with each session and I am really happy about it. These photos are about four weeks apart, whitening about every three days. It is so exciting to have my braces off AND have bright, white teeth! I really recommend Smile Brilliant as an affordable at-home teeth whitening system and have been recommending them since the first time I got to try their system. It is just so simple and really delivers results!

Their custom teeth whitening is not the only thing I love though. I am still in love with my cariPRO electric tooth brush. It is probably obvious that I am all about products for sensitive teeth, and this electric tooth brush has a “sensitive” setting, which is the main setting I use. The battery also lasts FOREVER. The next thing on my list to try is their cordless water flosser! I have only tried a water flosser once, and it had a cord and didn’t seem super easy. I have heard that once you use a water flosser (a good one), you will never want to go back to normal flossing, so I am super excited to try that. I have only heard good things about it.

A couple other products Smile Brilliant offers is a custom night guard to help with clenching your teeth and grinding your teeth at night, and a plaque highlighter to temporarily show you where plaque is gathering on your teeth so you know where to brush really well. This can be used by adults and kids, and I think it would be fun to use with my niece. We can see who is better at brushing their teeth and make it a game. Smile Brilliant also has oral probiotics coming out soon to help repopulate good bacteria in your mouth!

So many good things, that is why I really love and recommend this company. They take oral health very seriously, not just getting your teeth white. I can’t wait to keep my custom trays now that my teeth won’t be changing, and use them a couple times a month to keep any new stains off of my teeth. Once you get to the whiteness you want, it is just a matter of maintaining it.

Now for something fun, I get to do a give away! One of you will get a chance to win your own custom teeth whitening! This link will take you straight to the giveaway form: https://www.smilebrilliant.com/g/theblaw, and it is super simple to enter!

Also, use my code ‘THEBLAWTB20’ for 20% off any purchase from Smile Brilliant! Be sure to share what you end up trying! I can’t wait to see everyone’s beautiful white smiles! 😬

the.B.Law, lifestyle

My Blog Relationship Status

I have been thinking about my blog a lot lately, and how I want to get back into it (I am always in a state of “wanting to get back into it”). But I also need to address and come to terms of where I am at relationship wise with my blog. I started this seven years ago now (as Tragic Girls), and have been the.B.Law for five and a half years I think. But over the years, my blogging activities were circumstantial to what was going on in my life.

When I started off as Tragic Girls, it was both fun and scary, I posted timidly. I remember the first time I published, I was so giddy I didn’t even sleep well, wondering what people would think as they read my own words. Which thinking back on that now was silly considering I had no followers. But low and behold, some people read, and I felt cool.

Fast forward a year and a half, I changed the blog name to the.B.Law, to focus on style and fashion. I lived with my ex at the time. I was really pumped and excited about now changing my focus to style, but was still posting timidly since my ex thought the whole thing was lame. Instead of letting that fuel my fire in an “I’ll show you” kind of way, I let it hinder me. I was really hesitant to create an Instagram account for my blog because of him, but I made one anyways after one of my friends made one for her new blog with no hesitation. She inspired me, so I went for it (shoutout Amanda).

Another year and a half later and I was moving in with my older sister and her family after my ex broke it off. At that point, my blog relationship completely changed. I IMMERSED myself in it. I was planning, writing, and posting three times a week, planning and posting style pics almost every day on Instagram, and going out every weekend to create content. I loved Sundays because that was the day I would sit down with my phone, laptop, and planner and create my content calendar for the next week. This time was really enjoyable for me, I needed it. But it wasn’t until almost a year later that I realized I was using my blog as a crutch to cope with feeling broken. Which I wouldn’t necessarily say was a bad thing, but could have been if I would have kept it up longer than was needed. It was both a healing mechanism and a distraction.

Next, a year later (maybe? getting confused on the time), I was still living with my sister (but in their new house), and getting closer to one of my younger sisters. I was single and her boyfriend worked every weekend, so we started going line dancing. We started attending line dance lessons at our favorite bar a few times a week. These activities left me little time to blog, but I felt okay with that since I was having so much fun. But when I would sit down to blog, I again felt timid. This new circle of friends were not into the whole blog scene, which was fine, but I let it affect my decisions to blog. I didn’t want to appear lame that I had a blog that wasn’t big and wanted to build a following on Instagram. I was older than all of them and really let it get to my head. So I just didn’t blog much. Now were these their actual feelings towards blogging? I don’t know because I never felt confident enough to just do it and that is on me.

Second to last chapter in this story… another year or so later, and I have a new boyfriend. If you have been following then you know who he is. Preston, aka – Mr. Montana, and I start dating and get this… he LIKES that I write and even finds it ATTRACTIVE. Um what?! But now, flash forward to today, he has been back in CA for a year, and I still have not been blogging, mostly because we were and are always doing things on the weekends.

This past weekend I read the new launch of Indy Blue’s blog (the young 23 year old internet queen who inspires me), and was of course inspired after reading her latest post. I want to come back to this space I created because I WANT TO. Not because I feel like I should, or come back timidly because of who I am with or who I am hanging out with. I want to write freely about what I want whether that be a style post, a sappy in my feelings post, or just about something I think is fun. I created this blog for me, and I so often forget that. Not to be rude, but this blog isn’t about what you, my readers want, it is about what I want, and if that happens to interest you then great, pull up a chair. If not, you don’t have to read.

For so long, I have not been posting for me, letting others unknowingly dictate my presence in something I created.

I want to get back to a good place with my blog. The.B.Law is my creation and has been here for me through many different stages in my life over the past seven years. Now that I am stable (LOL), it’s time for me to make this platform stable, but with no pressure. As much as I love a planner, which I just bought a new super cute one, I am going to try and aim for a posting goal, rather than a posting deadline. I always feel like Friday is a good day for posting a blog, but if I miss a Friday, it is okay. As for what I might post about, who knows! Could be anything, but you can rest assured that whatever I post, will mean something to me. For so long, I have not been posting for me, letting others unknowingly dictate my presence in something I created. There is no fault on them, just lessons to learn for me. But now it is time.

So if you have followed along this far, thank you, and I hope you will continue to do so. Don’t be shy of the comments box, if you have ever felt the same feel free to share. We are all navigating this era of the world. The internet instantly connects us all, but is hurting real connections. Knowing you’re not alone in your experiences sure can make a difference.

Until my next post, talk to you soon.

xoxo – Britt

the.B.Law

Basically Custom

I have a serious issue when it comes to stationary, and by issue I mean I am obsessed with it. I can’t make it by the notebook aisle to save my life. Whenever little packs of blank note cards are in the sale section, I am buying three packs. I just love this stuff! I blame having an English degree and loving to write. That is my scapegoat and I am sticking to it!

Another thing I have been obsessed with recently is customization. Anything I have been able to customize lately, I have been doing it. So far it has been a lot of graphics and stickers. But the best thing has happened. I found Basic Invite, a site that lets you CUSTOMIZE STATIONARY! You can only imagine my excitement.

I was playing on their site and there is just so much you can do! So many colors (like 180)! So many options! I started with personalized notecards, OBVIOUSLY! I was surprised how easy it was. I literally designed my whole card in less than 10 minutes. Also I am gushing at the cute pattern on the back. I didn’t even think about adding something like that until it prompted me. Then the envelopes! Basic Invite has 40 COLOR OPTIONS of envelopes! You don’t have to go with plain old white if you don’t want… even though I did here. Don’t judge me, sometimes a girl likes to keep it simple and classy. I mean, look how cute this is!!

Basic Invite just has so many things you can make. I am a person who loves paper, if you couldn’t tell. This is true for me as well when it comes to invitations, holiday cards, and announcements. I love sending these, and I love receiving these. Sending and receiving as in the mail. I had just designed and sent out invitations right before I found Basic Invite, and I wish I could have used them. It would have saved me a lot of time. It is perfect timing however, for my little sister who recently graduated with her Masters degree, because Basic Invite also offers college graduation announcements, along with a ton of college graduation announcement templates! I wish I had these options when I was graduating college because these are so darn cute, and just as customizable as the stationary I designed above. I have already sent their link to my sister. Hey sis, when you are looking at those announcements, don’t forget the graduation party announcements too! We love a good party!

So BASICALLY, I highly recommend Basic Invite. It is definitely a company that will get repeated use for all life events. They have a promo code right now for 15% off, and you can bet I am using it because finding a good deal is my jam. Use code 15FF51 at checkout to apply your 15% off discount!

Check them out on Insta! I mean isn’t that the only way we really check people out these days? @basicinvite

	Tabitha Lawrence on I Just Want to be Cool Again
	Clean Teeth, Warm He… on A Smile That’s Electric!
	Clean Teeth, Warm He… on Check Out These Pearly Whites!
	the.B.Law on My Blog Relationship Status
	Tabitha Lawrence on My Blog Relationship Status