It’s me. Hi. I’m the problem, it’s me.

I don’t care how often that lyric is getting used by basic girls around the world, I still love it. I am the problem I am never on here and hopefully I will be the pushing change to come back.

Anywho, hello! Happy 2023! Not going to lie, not a fan of the number but whatever, can’t change the name of the year because I am weird. We are 20 days in and I am fighting the urge to feel behind because my sister and I decided we are doing this year different. We are going to give ourselves grace and space. Working on stopping the toxic mindsets of needing to change everything about us all at once. Instead our plan is to change everything about us, but slowly and one piece at a time. We call it… “Changing Our Entire Outlook On Life”, and I am here for it.

Last year was a big year. An exciting year! But an equally stressful year. My fiancé and I moved in together in February, and in November got married. So great! Like dream status. But that all came with a lot of stress and a lot of pressure put on myself by myself. I will do another post on the wedding and wedding stress later, but all of last year was basically consumed with that.

This year I am focusing on myself, my husband, and what makes me happy, no matter how small! My sister and I started off by making a list of little things that make us feel happy or put together. Simple things like having our nails painted (which I haven’t at all these last 20 days), making cute lattes at home, and dressing in our color aesthetic. It is hard to explain, but we basically want to make our aesthetic our lifestyle. I know that makes no sense to most, but if you get it, good for you.

These last 20 days I have been working on internally fighting the pressure to be at the gym every day, change my entire diet, and be hitting every single goal I wish I could be. Instead I have been giving myself time. Time to reflect on what I really want to accomplish, the person I want to be, and the wife I want to be. I really haven’t gotten that many tangible things done in this first month, but I think getting my mind right is a good first place to start.

So here is to the new year. I say it every year, but this time I truly have feelings this will be THE YEAR. The year that is mine, and not everyone else’s because I keep giving it to them. Sorry everyone, but it is my turn.

PS – my hair is brown now. What can I say, new year new me.