Okay-Ok-K

There is a certain small word that can not only change the intended or unintended meaning of a text, but also makes us girls totally freak out. This word is OKAY and its various forms as OK and the infamous and hated K. How is it that we have created such different meanings out of a word that simply expresses approval or acceptance? In reality OKAY, and both of its shorter versions, should all share the same meaning. However, us girls have taken it upon ourselves to create our own meanings, and yes I say us and our because we all know we have done it.

So what do these tiny words mean now in a world of texting? OKAY and OK in my eyes personally mean the same. I don’t think anything different of the two. I myself always use the form OK. The only time this word would set off an alarm for me would be if the person I am texting usually uses the form OKAY and replied with an OK instead. Then I would know that something is up. The biggest culprit of this topic though is the single letter K. The subtext of this letter is significantly longer than the word itself, if you can even consider it a word. Guys use this as a response in two ways, both of which drive girls crazy and instantly make us snap.

The first way that guys use this dumb little letter in a text is when they are being lazy. Yes why don’t you shorten an already short word. Do you guys realize how lazy that makes you look? If you are a frequent OK user this means that you literally cut a two letter word into a single digit. This does not do well on defending your literacy.

Texted me K

The other way guys use this word is deliberately. Some of you know what this word does to us girls and that’s why you do it. It’s like lighting a fuse on dynamite. For the guys that are just lazy, you not only freak us out, but you are plain irritating. However for the those of you who use this word on purpose, you are cruel. When we see this word K as a response it sends us girls over the edge. Why do we get this reaction from such a tiny word? It is because we have absolutely no idea what you’re are feeling in your response so the first feeling we jump to is anger. You write K and instantly we assume you’re mad. At first we are mad too just for the fact that you wrote it, but then we start to think. That’s the problem with girls’ minds, we over think everything. Then this leads back to my discussion about us girls turning psycho because of text messages we can’t understand. Now that you’re probably mad, because obviously are or you would have had the decency to send the O along with your K, we must now think back on everything that has happened since we last saw you and figure out what we did to make you upset. This task is not easy. A girl’s mind is like a microscope. If we are over analyzing the letter K just imagine everything else we over analyze. We will obsess over this letter until we know that you are not mad at us by either over nicely texting you showing you how not mad we are, going over to see you so that we can see with our own eyes that you are not mad, or doing the worst and asking you and starting a nothing argument.

When girls find out that this response was out of shear laziness we have mixed emotions of anger and relief. Angry that we waisted so much energy and stress analyzing an imaginary situation, and relief that we did nothing wrong. But the guys that purposefully use this response as a weapon, girls go even more crazy over. This generally happens when you are already in an argument. What makes this worse is that the guy is actually mad and he knows the way to make you just as mad is to tell you K. This usually occurs when us girls are trying to make nice at the end of the fight.

“Okay so I’ll talk to you tomorrow?”- “K”

“Well good night”- “K”

“I’ll text you later”- “K”

They know that you feel guilty and they prey on it to leave you cringing that he is still upset when he probably doesn’t even care anymore. Shame on you guys.

The lesson here for everyone, guys and girls, is to just add an O whenever you feel like saying K. Bring some relief to everyone and spare a night of reliving the past couple days in hope that you don’t find anything that could have made the other mad. Okay? Ok.

Guys I’m curious to know how you feel when a girl responds K?

Baptizing of the Dress

My roomie and I have a box that has been sitting in our “dining room” since we moved in in May. I say “dining room” with quotes because we have lived here since May and still have no table to dine at. Anyways this box is full of our clothes that we want to donate. We say every weekend that we will take it but it still hasn’t happened. That is okay though because we keep adding to it and cleaning out our closets.

While thinking about my closet I decided that I was going to add a certain dress to that box. I only wore it once, in Vegas, with my ex. Since then it has been hiding in the back of my closet trying to avoid me getting rid of it like everything else that is associated to him. Tonight I grabbed it and told my roomie that it was going in the box. Looking at it I forgot how cute it really was. She agreed and said that she really liked it. Then I realized that I have absolutely no pictures in this dress. It’s practically a virgin! We decided that since there are no pictures and no proof that I ever wore it that I can wear it again and make new associations with it. But first I told her that it needed to be baptized!

baptize

My roomie runs to her bathroom sink and starts splashing water on my dress saying over and over again “I baptize you!” Then we cheered! My dress is all good as new and now hanging in the front of my closet. You know you have a good roomie when she is willing to baptize the ex out of your Vegas dress. Thank you roomie! I love you!

Tragic Titles

Continuing on with my psycho girl discussion, let’s talk about titles, as in relationship titles. Why is it that whether or not having a title on our relationships affects how psycho we are? I experienced this before my boyfriend made us official, my BFFFF experienced it with her old guy, and my roomie is now currently experiencing it. This is a common phenomenon which actually made me feel better about my own psycho thoughts knowing that it happens to others. I realized that when there is no title girls feel no security. Sure you can be “exclusive” and only be dating each other, but that title makes a huge difference for girls. Without it we get those thoughts that yes he is dating me, but what if an opportunity arises with another girl and he thinks “hmmm we technically aren’t boyfriend and girlfriend.” We have all had those thoughts. Please do not forget that that is the crazy talking.

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It really is amazing how much of a difference a title can make. It changes the “he is not texting me back. What is he doing? Is he with another girl? Is he getting drunk around other girls?” into “my boyfriend isn’t texting me back because he is probably playing his video game,” like mine is doing right now. As girls we are possessive. We want him to be ours and we want to know that he is ours. We don’t want to deal with the guessing of whether or not he is ours. I hate the whole “What are we?” thoughts. When you are in that part of your relationship everyone seems to remind you that you aren’t official by asking you every time they see you, “is he your boyfriend yet?”, “are you two official yet?” You are only stressing your fellow sister out with these questions. This stage is awkward enough to be in, especially with introductions. What are you supposed to say, “um hi, this is the guy I am dating but he isn’t my boyfriend yet Dave.” The guys don’t know how to introduce you either so they go with what they think is right which is actually totally wrong and sends girls spiraling into an internal psycho tantrum by saying, “Hey this is my friend Jen.” FRIEND?! Oh no he did not just call you his friend. Honestly he doesn’t mean it like that, but he has no clue what he just started in your head which will potentially be an argument later on of you telling him that he just considers you friends, and he will not even remember the event of introducing you as that.

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Ladies as much as you can, try to keep the crazy in of how you feel not having a title. If you want that title he cannot know how psycho you are. Remember, let a little psychoness out at a time, guys cant handle it all at once. As for the title, don’t let it stress you out more than it should. Sure it’s okay to stress out about it if you’ve been dating forever and he hasn’t made it official. Sometimes guys just don’t realize that they are slacking. This is when you can let a little smidgen of psycho show and have the “what are we?” talk. This way you either corner him into making you his girlfriend, or you’ll know if that is even his intention or if you are wasting your time. Be strong girls and be openly psycho in small doses.

Subtext Psycho

How many times have you told your girlfriends that you are having a psycho girl moment? For my roomie and I this is a daily occurrence. Some of you may not know what a psycho girl moment is so let me take a moment to enlighten you. A psycho girl moment is when you are having a thought that if your guy knew about it, he would think you’re a psycho and either be scared or break up with you, or both. Almost all of my psycho girl moments, like for many other girls, have been a result of texting. Texting can be so misleading because you cannot hear a tone of voice which makes a huge difference in conversations. Tone is how we determine moods, or emphasize words. Without it we are left to guessing which can cause a huge mess. Although texting is the biggest culprit of psycho girl moments, it still stands as our main form of communication.

Now what is an example of a psycho girl moment? I’ll give you one of mine. My boyfriend was on his way home from visiting his family and I was going to meet him at his place. I was trying to text him and all of his responses were getting shorter and shorter. Suddenly all I could think about was what I could have possibly done to make him mad. I mean he had to be mad at me right? Why else would he be texting me so short? He never had before? I must have done something wrong! I scrolled back through and read all of our texts from that day. There was nothing out of the ordinary and I didn’t say anything bad. Now I was really freaked out because I couldn’t figure out why he was mad because he obviously was.

I was so tempted to text him and ask if everything was okay. But then what if something was wrong? Or even worse, what if nothing was wrong? If I ask him what is wrong, and he says nothing, then he is going to ask me why? Then I am going to have to tell him that he is texting weird, and then he thinks I am a psycho girlfriend and it will start something out of nothing. So instead of texting him and starting a big psycho mess, I called my sister. I told her that I was tempted to text him and she pretty much slapped me through the phone. She told me that everything was probably fine and to just wait until I see him. Good idea. So I waited.

text vomit

When I heard the key turn at his place and I knew he was about to walk in I was so nervous. Was he going to walk in mad, normal, smiling? I just didn’t know!  I saw him come through the door. He seemed okay, just a little tired but that was okay, it was late. I asked how the drive was and he told me it sucked and that there was so much traffic. So there was the reason he was irritated. He absolutely hates traffic. After he put his stuff away he came up to me. He told me sorry he was texting so short. On his way to his family’s he had gotten a speeding ticket and he said he didn’t want to get another one for texting on the phone. So right there explained it all. What I took and exaggerated in my own mind of me doing something wrong that he was mad at, was really him driving in traffic and not wanting to get a ticket. You could imagine my relief. I also felt a little foolish for making up an entire scenario in my head, but not nearly as foolish as if I would have actually asked him if something was wrong.

These psycho moments are bound to happen. We are girls and girls are psycho, that’s just how it is. My advice to all of you though is to seek help when you are feeling the urge to act on you psycho moment. Phone a friend and talk it out before you doing something you regret. You need to hide and contain your psycho self deep down. She tries to come out and you must control her! My other piece of advise is to make sure you and your guy actually have real conversations on the phone sometimes and not just text all the time. It really makes a difference. Don’t get caught up in the imaginary subtext of your text that you created in your head. Don’t be a psycho.

Farewell to Retail

Until a little over a week ago I finished my last day in retail. What a long journey that was. Seven years and eight months to be exact. Do you know what it is like to work in the retail industry? You learn a lot about different people and you learn to have a lot of patience and self control. Don’t get me wrong I love the industry. Working in retail not only gave me a passion for style, but also gave me a serious shopping addiction. I was constantly bringing home new things to add to my closet and of course no closet is ever big enough. When I moved in May I had to condense my overly full walk-in to a small, one sided closet with sliding doors. You can imagine my struggle and the mess of clothes constantly on my floor. To be honest I don’t think that I have enough room in my closet and drawers to fit all of my clothes. This is why I hate doing laundry because I physically cannot put it away. Everything fits much better when there is a basket full of laundry needing to be done. Anyways, I am hoping now that I do not work in retail I will buy much less clothes. Except its been a week and I’ve bought about seven things and my excuse was that I needed it for my new job. I’m working on getting better I promise. Oh wait, I forgot I ordered a dress and a pair of pants too, they are on their way. But that it is!
With all this being said I now graduate to the next step in my life. I am going from a store to an office and I am actually really exited. I am learning something new that I can take to many different jobs. I’ve been training on accounts receivable and it’s been good. So I want to take this time to say farewell to retail, and no one deserves this farewell more than my customers.
Farewell to the customers who come in right when we open to return five items that they don’t have a legitimate excuse to return them except for, “I changed my mind,” because they probably bought them all to get free shipping on the one item that they actually wanted. You’re a joy to start my day off with. And farewell to the customers who want the large on the bottom of the perfectly folded stack of tee shirts and rather than nicely picking up the entire stack to get to their shirt, they grabbed the large and flip the entire stack into a heaping pile. It’s my pleasure to clean up the mess you leave.
The next customer is one of my favorites. Farewell to the customers who come in with their children and think they do not have to watch them since they are inside a store. I absolutely love being a baby sitter and not getting paid extra for it. You have really showed me how to be a good mother one day. For example one of my customers was so smart. She had a stroller with a baby and an older toddler who was walking, and she wanted to try some clothes on. That was no problem, we had a handicap dressing room for reasons such as this so women in wheelchairs or who have strollers can have enough room to try clothes on. So I went to let the woman into the large dressing room so that she could bring her stroller and her toddler in. Instead she had this great idea to leave her stroller and her toddler outside the dressing room so that she could have the big room to herself. While trying on her clothes her baby was crying and the toddler was running outside and hanging over the side of the fountain in front of our store. Some of the best parenting I have seen.
Last, but not least, I want to say farewell to the customers who will try anything to get something on sale. Customers and I will run into many discrepancies while doing a transaction. For instance the jeans I had scanned were $74, but the customer for some reason seemed to think that they are on sale for $20 and told me that I am wrong. I asked them to show me where they got them from. They walked me to the table that had two levels. The top level had tee shirts across the whole thing with a large sign clearly stating “Tee Sale $20”. The jeans were on the bottom row. I explained that the sign that said “Tee Sale $20” meant that the tees were $20. The customer then told me that our sign was way too confusing and that they don’t want the jeans and they left. There are also the customers that blatantly ask if they can have a discount at the register. When I ask if they have a coupon or a promotion code they tell me no. Then I tell them then no you cannot gave a discount. Lastly of course farewell to the tag switchers. The ones who pick up brand new items and switch the tag with a clearance item as if we do not know our own inventory, “I am so sorry ma’am but SOMEONE switched the tag on this item with a tag from clearance.” Or better yet if I catch it before I scan it I just rip the tag off and tell them that it is missing a price tag and I’ll go get a new one. Usually they decide that they don’t want that item anymore.
I could really go on and on about all of these fabulous customers. In fact I think I’ll start writing a book about them since there are so many, and I wouldn’t want to leave any out. Yes, consider this a preview of that book. These were just a few things to note that I will miss from my retail days. It was great and thanks to my customers there was never a dull moment. Ill be sure to add you all in the dedications page in my upcoming book. As painful as it is to leave, I must move on and grow up. If I am to ever go back to the retail industry it will be in a corporate office position. But don’t worry I’ll keep on shopping to remember the good old days. My closet is always hungry for more!

Furniture is for Peasants

When Heather and I first decided to move out obviously we were so excited and probably the only thing we could talk about was how we were going to decorate and how our apartment was going to be so “shabby chic” and blah blah blah. Well we signed our lease and had a month before we could move in so we started packing our things in our parents’ houses. We also started thinking about what we were going to need for our place. Both of us were only coming with a bed, a dresser, and maybe a couple nightstands. Great we would have furnished rooms, but what about the rest of the apartment? Our list of what we needed wasn’t big but it was all big things like a refrigerator, a couch, coffee table, kitchen table with chairs, a TV and TV stand, all of the stuff like that. We were trying to think of ways to get all of these things. It was getting close and we still had acquired none of it so our last resort plan, which was a joke but kind of not really, was a blow up couch, an ice chest for a fridge, and a fold out camping table for the kitchen table. Yes I know, we are so classy. But if it came down to it, we would have rocked these redneck ways. Champagne taste on a moon shine budget ya’ll!

Well good news for everyone, we did not have to do that! Before we moved Heather’s parents decided they wanted to get a new couch and that we could have their old one. They weren’t getting a new couch though until Memorial Day which was like three weeks after we moved in, no big deal. We could be couchless until then. Then they decided we could have it when we moved in! Heather your parents are angels. So couch was done. The next big thing was the fridge since it is kind of essential if we want to have food in our place. We were both in no position to really buy a new one. Heather posted on Facebook asking if anyone knew of a fridge for sale. Luckily one of our sorority sisters had recently moved out and she had a fridge that she needed to get rid of, and get this, she sold it to us for $50! Thank you so much sister, you are an angel too! We didn’t even measure it to make sure it would fit in our apartment. I just had my dad pick it up with me when we moved and we crossed our fingers it would be okay. It was, there is actually a lot of room on the side of it because it is a pretty small fridge. The door of the freezer actually fell off while we were moving it. We opened the trailer and my dad handed me the door and said “here carry this”. Awesome. But it works great! Besides the fact that the inside of the door doesn’t have a railing I guess you would say so we broke the mayo the other day opening the door too fast. The jar tried to escape and cracked a whole in the lid. It knows better for next time now.

Okay so now we had a couch and a fridge. We have been here for a month and a week now. It wasn’t until last week that we finally got a coffee table. Heather and I discussed making a cute one we saw on Pinterest but then finally went against it because we didn’t have time, it would end up costing more than we wanted, and if we made it there was a chance there would be no more blog since it required using a saw and we both wanted to keep our fingers (#wearenotcoordinated). We decided on a cheap $20 coffee table from Ikea. Last week I was going to pick it up but when I finally went to Ikea for something else I needed I didn’t have time to get the table so I told Heather I would get it next time. The next day Heather texted me and said, “Look what I found!” and sent me this picture:

Image How cool is that? It is like a vintage trunk! I texted her back and said, “Do you think it is big enough to be a coffee table?” She responded with an, “Uh yeah I am pretty sure,” with this picture:

Image Yeah that is freaking big and takes up her entire seat. So she brings it to the apartment and it is in her car for a good three or four days because we didn’t have a time during the day together to get it out. Finally on Wednesday we did. We were so excited to have a coffee table! Heather unlocked her car and we opened the door and started to take it out. It was a little more difficult than we thought. We tried a couple more ways but still couldn’t get the sucker out. The trunk was being stubborn!

Image Or maybe it was just too big to even be in the car. Her brother put it in for her but wasn’t there to take it out. It was so difficult. We had to roll down her window so the corner could poke out, and had to have one of us lift up and out while the other one of us was inside the car pushing it. Success though and we did it! Now it is cleaned up with furniture polish and is sitting right in front of our couch. It is so “shabby chic”. Granted if you put your feet up on it they will probably go to sleep since the trunk is taller than the seats on the couch but that is besides the point. The point is now we only need a kitchen table and we will be fully furnished! It’s only been over a month but who is counting? At least we have a coffee table we can eat at now!

OMG more spiders!

Heather and I were just sitting on our couch trying to watch the movie Tangled with my sister Nicole and my niece Dakota, when I looked up and I saw this!

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Why is it so big?
Me: “Nicole, you’re a mom, you kill it!”
Nicole: “What? No it’s you’re apartment!”
Heather: “We have bleach spray!”
Me: “Yeah okay go get it!”
Heather went to the kitchen and got all purpose cleaner with bleach.
Heather: “Okay I’ll spray and you hit it”
Me: “Okay let’s do it!”

This is how it went:

Well the good news is we killed the spider! But made my niece cry. Spiders beware! We will poison and kill you! This same day we went to the store and bought bug spray and will be spraying every entry and window to our apartment. Tragic Girl Headquarters is no place for a spider.

XO- Tragic Girls