Tragic events, Tragic Shorts

Jumping, Screaming, Not So Joy Ride

I was driving down the freeway after work when I saw something move on the windshield. It was a spider but oh thank God it was on the outside. Wait… That’s on the inside! Holy mother, oh my goodness I am going to crash! It’s okay, it’s a small one, I can kill it. Let me just grab a napkin out of my bag of french fries (tragic in itself). The spider came closer to me so I grabbed my napkin and went for it! Guess what happened?? It freaking jumped! There was a jumping spider in my car on the freeway. I was thinking just be cool, don’t crash.

So I was driving carefully but kept watching the spider. It started making a web across my WHOLE windshield! Great, this is just terrible. Finally I noticed it coming my way again after awhile. It was trying to hook it’s web on my door. How dare he! I went after him again! I think I hit him? He either jumped or fell. God knows where he is, please let him rest in peace. I just pray that I don’t get into a giant web when I get in my car in the morning! Seriously the more I fear spiders, the more they come after me!

Tragic Shorts

A Tragic Short- Biker Gang

This morning I was on my way to get my hair done and I was running late. Of course when you’re running late you’re also running out of gas. When the bottom line of my gas gauge starts blinking then that’s bad, like I think maybe ten miles left bad. I was driving fast and trying to get to my appointment on time, so burning more gas. I was a few exits away when my line started blinking! If I could just make it to my exit there was a gas station right above it. 

Okay there it is I’m going to make it. I get off, make my left turn, and get to the corner by the gas station. By this time I’m guessing I have maybe two miles left. Woo that was close. I turn left, then get in the turn lane for the gas station. I am behind a car who is also waiting, but we can’t turn. Why you ask? Because of the huge line of spandex wearing bicyclists coming down the street! It never ended! Are you kidding me? I’m going to sit here and run out of gas right in front of a gas station because a spandex biker gang won’t get out of my way!

Finally there was a break in the line and I went for it! So close but I did not run out of gas. SAFE!